The Designer’s Muscle: On Professional Isolation
Overview
This exploration is a personal reflection on the silent struggle of being an independent designer in a specialized industry. It documents the moment I realized I was becoming disconnected from the broader design ecosystem and how I decided to fight that isolation. Rather than analyzing a specific product, this piece looks at the professional muscles that go quiet when we focus too much on internal constraints, and the process of picking them back up again.
The Startup Reality
When I first started, I used to explore a lot in my designs. I wanted to see what was possible. But as I moved through this industry, I started to learn exactly what was doable and what was not. Now, I find myself unconsciously avoiding complex designs or workflows that I know are just not achievable with our dev team.
It is depressing, but it’s also a crucial decision you have to make in a startup. There are so many things I need to give up on while trying my best to maintain the design quality and usability. In a way, this trained my problem-solving skills because everything will not always go as what we expect. You learn to work within the shallow scope of a fixed colour palette and a team that hasn't integrated with AI yet.
Being the Only Designer in the Room
Because I am an independent designer, there is no information sharing. I have no one to discuss my design decisions with, so I am always standing alone. In this environment, anyone feels they can challenge a UX choice based on personal taste.
I’ve had many moments where people without a design background would challenge me on a choice of icon or a simple change in the order of a form. To them, it looks like I just did that because I "liked it," or they thought I did not pay attention to the original order when I actually intentionally moved it. They don’t see the critical thinking about user behaviour that led to those decisions. While this constant design education forced me to get better at backing my stance, it also meant my growth was confined to my own perspective.
The Apple Store Moment
The awakening happened while I was at the Apple Store buying a MacBook Pro. The specialist casually mentioned tools like Cursor and Affinity, tools that are currently huge in the design community. I stood there in shock, realizing I didn't even know what these programs were.
What made it more alarming was that I browse LinkedIn on a daily basis to make sure I’m up to date. I thought I knew what was happening in the industry, but somehow, tools like Cursor and Affinity never even showed up on my feed. I had fallen into a black hole of professional isolation. My algorithm had adapted to my specific industry, filtering out the cutting-edge tools that other designers were already using. I realized that my deep focus on building management had turned into a professional blind spot.
Watching Others Build for Fun
I started watching many YouTube videos of how other designers are building their own little app tools to improve little things in their daily lives. What really struck me was its efficiency. They were doing this for their own personal use, not even for work.
Seeing them build things just for themselves was a huge shock to my system. It made me realize that while I was busy simplifying my designs to fit work constraints, others were using technology to expand their personal freedom and creativity.
Moving Forward
I’ve always noticed patterns in things like Tesla’s FSD logic or Pokémon TCG’s engagement, but I had nowhere to express those thoughts. It wasn’t until recently that it clicked for me that I could share them through my portfolio. Using AI-assisted tools like Gemini helped me gather these pieces into more holistic insights. It allowed me to stretch a muscle that had gone dormant from years of repetitive work and proved I could still think beyond the technical ceiling of my industry.
Since awakening from this dusty brain state, I hope to communicate and interact with other designers more. I want to stay connected with people in the industry who care about the why behind a design, not just how fast something can be built. I don’t want to only justify my decisions. I want to exchange ideas and learn from how others are thinking. In a time when new AI tools appear constantly, staying sharp in UX feels less about keeping up with everything and more about choosing what is actually worth learning. This exploration series is my first step in making sure my design muscle never stays quiet for too long again.
